


The Reason

by neverwantedtodance



Category: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Genre: Character Death, F/F, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-20
Updated: 2013-10-20
Packaged: 2017-12-29 23:26:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1011335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neverwantedtodance/pseuds/neverwantedtodance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Twilight Sparkle knew this day would come. She just didn't expect it to be so soon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Reason

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published on Fimfiction.net on 31st August 2013 (http://www.fimfiction.net/story/124959/the-reason).  
> For those interested in the full authors notes see there (they're not particularly interesting so I wouldn't really bother)

The early evening light cast a comforting glow over the Canterlot market as ponies shut up their stalls for the day, packing up items and collecting bits, a peaceful atmosphere surrounding them all.

A mare pushed her way through the crowd desperately, as if she was running away from some great demon. As she ran, she kept checking her watch for the time, even though it slowed her progress down severely. A dark cloak swamped her, revealing little of her features other than lavender hooves furiously pacing themselves.

She exited the market and slowed as she reached a park, the trees swaying in the breeze and the setting sun creating a serenity no pony could match. This was disturbed by the mare trotting along the path, her hoofsteps making the gravel crunch underneath her as she raced to the gate that would let her exit the park.

As she reached the edge of the park a building cast it's shadow over the greenery, its large structure looming down on the mare who stood looking up at it from the bottom of the drab grey stairs that led to the entrance doors. She sighed, relieved, and pulled back her travelling cloak, revealing a lavender coat, unicorn horn and wings.

Twilight Sparkle folded up the cloak neatly with her magic and placed it in the saddlebags adorning her sides. She pushed open the doors apprehensively and entered the hospital.

* * *

The interior differed immensely from the exterior. Shiny white floors and soft cream walls, with large windows letting what little sunlight there was left in. Patients and visitors alike sat on comfortable chairs, talking quietly amongst themselves, a laugh sometimes puncturing the air gleefully.

Twilight ignored this, trotting quickly to the reception desk. She was recognized instantly by the red earth pony on duty, not just because of her royal status but because of her frequent presence in the hospital lately.

"Do I still have time?" Twilight Sparkle's usually calm voice was streaked with a gut-wrenching worry. "Is she-"

"She's still with us." mare said in a soft Trottingham accent. "You can go on in, Your Highness."

The scholarly mare managed a weak smile. After all these months, and the receptionist still called her that.

She made her way along the pristine corridors, repeating a path she knew well. Every hoofstep, every right turn and every flight of stairs she could re-walk in her sleep.

Finally she reached room 406. With a clear anxiety she composed herself for what she would see before casting the door handle in a field of raspberry-coloured magic and opened it.

The mare lying among the crisp white hospital sheets was a mere shadow of who she used to be. Her rainbow-hued hair over the years had acquired grey streaks, and the laugh lines around her eyes became more prominent, as did the crinkles around her mouth. While her cyan coat was still its original bright, it had become increasingly difficult for the pegasus to move her wing joints lately, though flying was still a favourite past-time of hers.

What didn't come with old age, though, was the bone-tired expression on Rainbow Dash's face, even as she slept, or the purple bruises that stood out along her forelegs and wings.

Twilight sighed and encased the wilting red roses in the jar by her wife's bedside in magic. It disappeared and she conjured up fresh water and a new bouquet- today they were lilies.

A splash of excess water hit Rainbow's sleeping face and she woke, peeing her eyes slowly, as if with great difficulty. Twilight rushed to her bedside and took Rainbow Dash's hoof in her own.

"Rainbow Dash?" she asked, trying to sound upbeat.

The pegasus coughed slightly and smiled weakly. "Heya Twi," she said in a crackling voice so different from her younger one, that had still been present in their forties, before this illness took over their lives with an iron fist "I guess I'm still awesome enough to be here." she feebly joked, before a coughing fit struck her. She waved away Twilight Sparkle's attempts at help, proving she could still raise a hoof.

"Don't try to joke about that." Twilight scolded gently. "How have you been?"

She asked this every day she visited- which was whenever she could- and each time hoped for a more positive answer. She was always disappointed.

"Oh, you know, the usual."

"It's been bad?" Twilight grimaced.

"Hurts like Tartarus." Rainbow moaned. "I had a fever yesterday, but the doctors say it's a bit better today. My bones have been aching, and I've had a bad headache, but I feel fine now, honestly. I'm fine." she assured, before coughing again.

Twilight winced. It sounded like Rainbow Dash was far from fine, but the pegasus recovered from her coughing fit with ease.

"I brought you something." Twilight said, opening her on of her saddlebags and bringing out a worn book, the pages crinkled and the colours on the cover dulled in the way only a well-read book got.

"Daring Do and the Quest for the Sapphire Stone. It's  first edition. It reminded me of you." Twilight said.

Rainbow set the book down gently on the bedside table next to the vase.

"Thanks, I love it." Rainbow turned her head slightly to look out of the window at the first few faint stars appearing in the sky, barely visible through the haze of the sunset.

"I don't have much time left." she murmured sadly.

"Visiting time lasts for half an hour, you know that." Twilight Sparkle tried to keep upbeat.

"That's not what I meant." Dash dismissed. "Literally, I don't have much time left. I'm dying, Twilight." the mare said gently.

A tear dripped down Twilight's face before she could brush it away. "I know." she whispered.

Rainbow sighed. It broke her heart to see her love like this, knowing there was nothing she could do about it.

She pointed to a red button beside her bed. "This button will call the doctor's over if anything ... if anything gets serious."

Twilight nodded, tears dripping down her face, of which she had no control over.

"Don't cry. Please don't cry. I want to spend what might be my last few hours with you. Happy."

Twilight Sparkle nodded, complying to her dying wife's wishes. She wiped the tears off her face and desperately tied to control herself.

And they talked, the half hour of visiting time flying by in a daze as they discussed their friends, their family, their adventures and their marriage. They talked about the weather team, Discord, Chrysalis, Daring Do ... anything to distract them from what they knew was coming in the night.

"Do you remember the time when you sneaked out to get the book from the hospital the time you broke your wing, an ended up with the whole police chasing you?" Twilight giggled.

"Oh yeah! And I ended up in front of the library. I can't believe I was so desperate to finish the book!" Rainbow Dash laughed, before breaking down in a bout of coughs, each one sounding painfully hoarse. When she continued to cough, Twilight worryingly poured Rainbow Dash a glass of water and tried to help her to drink.

Just as the coughing began to subside a doctor, and pale orange unicorn walked in calmly, his presence a calming one, carrying a clipboard and pen encased in yellow magic.

"Is everything alright here?" he asked.

Just as Twilight opened her mouth to speak, Rainbow Dash gave a weak cough.

"Everything's fine, doc. I can handle it." she said weakly.

"Well then, I really think you should be getting home then, Miss Sparkle. It's late, and Rainbow Dash needs her sleep."

Twilight Sparkle was aghast. She couldn't leave now. She  **couldn't**.

"But-but I can't! Who knows what will happen tonight? I have to stay with her, please!" she protested, tears brimming in her eyes again, only barely contained.

The young doctor shifted from one foot to the other. "I'm not sure this is the best idea, considering her condition-"

"Please, doctor, please. I have to stay!" Twilight interrupted him, growing desperate.

"I'm don't think you can-"

"I am a PRINCESS!" Twilight finally exclaimed, wiping away a stray tear. "You  _will_  let me stay."

Before the doctor could open his mouth to protest, Twilight Sparkle spoke again. "That's an order." she snapped.

"Yes, Your Majesty." the doctor bowed, then left the room.

Twilight bowed her head and sighed, the tears ceasing. She hated playing the royalty card, but this was worth every bit of it.

A cough alerted her back to the present, and she realized Rainbow Dash was clapping very slowly.

"Now that," she rasped, "was pretty cool. Even by my standards."

And with that, she lay her head back on the soft, thick white pillow and closed her eyes, slipping back into a thick slumber, the rise and fall of her chest along with the heart monitor the only sign she was still alive.

It was going to be a long night.

Twilight sighed, taking a seat beside the bed and getting comfortable, adjusting her wings and shifting around on the cool hard aqua plastic.

She took hold of Rainbow Dash's hoof, careful not to disturb the sleeping cyan mare, tenderly stroking the small purple-black bruises dotted around.

She never wanted it to end like this.

She knew that one day Rainbow Dash would die, and she would be there to see it, and see ALL of her friends die, going through immortality with the pain, but she never thought it would be as early as this.

The illness had struck unexpectedly and quickly. They were still so young, yet Rainbow Dash seemed to have aged fifteen years since the two years she'd been going in and out of hospital.

It wasn't fair. It shouldn't be like this.

Despite the alicorn's efforts to stay awake she felt slumber taking over and, try as she might, she couldn't help sleep taking her in it's soft arms, and the last thing she saw before she closed her eyes and drifted off was Rainbow Dash's face, smiling slightly in her sleep.

* * *

wilight woke, startled that she wasn't in the familiar hospital room where Rainbow Dash lay sleeping. The sights and sounds of the peaceful green meadow, the bright blue sky and the fluffy clouds drifting aimlessly by let her know that she was dreaming.

She stood up, the grass flattened beneath her and stretched, observing the area around her. There didn't appear to be anyone but her.

Just then the wind picked up, blowing Twilight's mane around her face and obscuring her vision for a few minutes while the mini hurricane pitched up. Twilight tried to use her hooves to keep a firm grip on the ground.

And then, just as randomly as it started, it fell, leaving only quiet peace once again. Twilight used magic to brush her mane out the way, and then stumbled with shock from the sight that was in front of her.

Two pairs of cyan hooves. Wings spread outwards, like she used to be able to do when she was young. No bruises dotted around. Her mane tossed about gently in an invisible breeze. Playful magenta eyes. No wrinkles. And a smirk as wide as the sky.

"Rainbow Dash!" exclaimed Twilight Sparkle. "What are you ... Are you ..."

"Oh, hey Twi." the pegasus cheerfully said.

Twilight swallowed nervously. What did this mean? Was she just dreaming, conjuring up what she wanted to see most? Or was this a message from the other side?

Rainbow Dash laughed at her wife's confusion.

"How can you be so happy?" Twilight asked.

"I'm happy because I'm spending time with you. And because I'm awesome! But it's mainly you. It's always you, y'know." the mare blushed.

"Are you ... are you dead?" Twilight asked, a single tear falling. A life without Rainbow ... Without her love ...

Rainbow Dash looked at the ground sadly. "Twilight-"

"Why?" she exclaimed, stepping closer to her. "Why did you leave me on my own? You were supposed to take care of me? How can you do that if you've left me?"

It was only after she'd finished speaking that she realized she was crying, and stopped her tears with a quick spell. She had to be strong.

"You have to understand, Twi. Please. You have to." Rainbow Dash insisted, stepping closer to her love, close enough to touch. But when she moved a wing to wrap around Twilight's body like she used to, it went straight through her. Twilight Sparkle gasped at the strange sensation. It felt like all the feathers on the wing were tickling her stomach and bones.

She raised a hoof to stroke Rainbow Dash's mane, but it was like there was nothing but empty air, not a pony, for her to touch.

The heartbroken expression on Twilight's face was too much to bear, and tears began to drip down Rainbow's face. She laughed through the pain.

"This is different- I'm crying and you're not."

"Don't make me start." the lavender unicorn joked, holding back her own grief.

"You've gotta understand, Twi, that I didn't wanna go. I never wanted to leave you- yet you knew I would. You knew one day this would happen." she continued.

"And yet I married you anyway. Because I love you." she said.

"The illness came too soon. Way too soon. I was hoping I'd have more time. But you have to carry on, Twi. You have to- for our friends." Rainbow Dash said, twitching her wings, as if yearning to fly again. And now she could. She could fly for eternity.

Realization struck Twilight like the force of an explosion. "Oh, Pinkie Pie! And Applejack, and Rarity, and Fluttershy! They'll be devastated they weren't here to say goodbye."

"They'll understand. They'll have to, and if they don't, you have to make them. You have to be strong. You have to let me go, and move on."

"But I don't want to be strong. I want to stay here with you." Twilight said, sounding like a filly.

"I know you want to. But you can't, you'd burn up. It's to do with the air particles. And anyway, even if you could, you're one of the princesses of Equestria. You can't just drop that. People need you to be there- especially our friends at a time like this. I don't know how long I can stay here. I have to pass over. It hurts, Twilight. It'll hurt a lot. But you can be strong, because you're going to be strong for me. You're going to carry on, and maybe even fall in love again. And when you do pass over, I'll meet you. I'll always be waiting for you."

Twilight took a deep breath. "Okay. I think ... I think I can do it."

"Of course you can, you're awesome!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, flying into the air and striking a pose. Twilight laughed and flew up to join her.

"One day, we'll fly together again." Rainbow murmured.

Twilight stared off into the distance, watching the peaceful clouds become violent and dark grey, as if a storm was coming to interrupt their perfect world.

"R-rainbow Dash?" she asked.

Dash turned and stared at the clouds sadly. "It's time. I have to pass over now."

Fresh tears appeared in Twilight Sparkle's eyes. "Please, no. Please don't go."

"I'm sorry." Rainbow Dash's voice was faint over the storm as it homed in on her, gathering into a spiral and consuming her. "I love you Twilight. Be strong ..."

The clouds covered everything, and Twilight was struggling in the darkness, fighting for control with her wings as her wife's voice got fainter and fainter.

* * *

Twilight opened her eyes quickly, expecting to see Rainbow Dash lying on her hospital bed in front of her, but was instead greeted by the corridor outside her room and the faces of three doctors.

"Ah, Your Majesty, you're awake." said the female pegasus.

"Why am I here? How is she? Is she better?" Twilight asked. Despite her dream last night, there was still a small part of her mind that believed Rainbow Dash might still make it.

"I'm afraid it's the worst. She passed away peacefully in her sleep at about half five this morning. We're so very sorry for your loss." said a green earth pony.

Twilight closed her eyes and took a deep breath to steady herself. She knew it was coming, but to hear it actually said out loud was heartbreaking.

_Rainbow Dash is dead._

It was actually real. It was actually happening.

She opened her eyes again and saw the doctors staring at her curiously. But something seemed different.

If she peered closely, she could just about see the outline of a cyan pegasus hovering behind the doctors. With a rainbow mane and cheeky smirk, it was obviously Rainbow Dash.

Twilight blinked. She was sure she was imagining her, some way to cope with the pain of losing her first love.

But no. The mare was really there. Twilight smiled slightly and Rainbow Dash winked back at her, then faded from her vision.

She'd be alright.

It was like Rainbow Dash had said. It would hurt at first. And the pain would always be there, in the back of her mind.

But it would get better, if she was strong.

And she knew she could be strong.

Because Rainbow Dash asked her to be.


End file.
